Mama Bears Kill Big Stingin' Bug

So the other Saturday night, my mom, sister, the boys' godmom, and I were hanging out with a total of six kids when Godmama heard a buzz, and saw...a huge stinging bug.  Two things to know about big stinging bugs: 1--you don't want one in your house, and 2--if you make them mad, they sting. 

Instinct took over and she dashed to B's room where she guarded several of the boys playing in there.  Mom called for a shoe and one of us took a whack at the Big Stingin' Bug.  She got it, but he was only dazed.  He flew a dazed circle then flew off.

Great.  Now we'd made Big Stingin' Bug mad.  Cass, Mom and I grabbed a shoe apiece and tried to position chairs below him to get another crack at him.  G followed around, pointing an invisible gun and shooting him.  Soon I found him by the light over the kitchen sink, positioned my chair, and whacked at him.  The light globe was in the way, though, so it wasn't a perfect shot.  He lazily nosedived towards me.  My bladder went weak.  I charged off the chair, through the dining and "reading rooms" and toward the master bathroom.  Cass followed with G and K, and closed the door behind them, telling them to stay where it was safe.  Then she went back out to battle with Mom. 

I have no idea how Big Stingin' Bug survived as many whacks as he did.  It shouldn't be bugly possible.  By the time I returned, Mom was screaming for a magazine.  I searched high and low, but I'd recently ridded the house of all that extra paper, so all I could offer was a thin textbook.  It didn't have the malleability to conform to the slanted ceilings, so it did little good.

The next request was for a broom.  I was pretty sure Josh had taken it out to the shed, but was lucky to find it the utility room.  Now, Big Stingin' Bug was hiding, though.  We searched and searched, and even took one of the boy's suggestions to turn off all but one light so Big Stingin' Bug would gravitate toward it, but it was futile.  Finally we gave up. 

It was then that Mom heard the buzz.  She looked up, and Big Stingin' Bug was right above her.  She called for the broom.  I tried to strike him, but I'm not really good with a broom, so I handed it off to her.  She got him, and he dropped to the floor in front of the sink.  He was still moving.  She slammed him with the broom, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 times!  He twitched, and Cass through her flip flop at him. 

Now to dispose of him.  since he'd been so resilient, we picked him up with a dustpan (which, as you can see from the photo is really dusty), and flushed him...twice.  Tenacious bugger. 

Keeping Boys Quiet in a Waiting Room

B, G, and I waited for Josh in a waiting room for about an hour tonight.  Yikes!  I'd brought a book for G, and for a while, he looked at it while B perused Highlights magazine.  After about twenty minutes, though, G abandoned the book and B claimed it.  This was our first crisis.  G only wanted the book if B had it; B wanted the book mostly to tick G off.  I ruled in favor of B since I couldn't prove that he was being a jerk, and because G needs to learn that if you leave it, it's fair game. 

Luckily, there was construction just outside another window in the waiting room.  If only the machines had been running, the boys might have been occupied for more than five minutes.  After that time, G began climbing on B, and a wrestling match was in the making.  I separated them and we took a bathroom break. 

When we returned to the chairs, books were out.  G was getting antsy.  I found a matchbox 4-wheeler in my knitting bag and handed it off to G, who was content.  B was upset, though, because he didn't have a vehicle.  Referee again. 

Once that became boring to G (and just after I spanked him for raspberrying at me when I told him to sit), I noticed the box of buttons in my knitting bag.  Thank God I like to knit.  I dumped a handful out for G, who happily lined them up, then curved them into a "rainbow", then circle.  B wanted to play, too, so I gave him a handful.  He wanted the 4-wheeler to drive on his "obstacle course", but I foresaw another fight, so I gave him 2 large blue buttons to use as a pretend car. 

G hopped in and out of his circle, then picked up all the yellows.  Then I had him pick up all the pinks.  Then he picked up all the browns.  Twenty minutes of peace!  I tried to snap a picture, but B had destroyed the course in the time it took me to click "camera" and "click" on my phone.  Oops!

PS: for all you fellow worriers, there were no little kids around.  We were also very careful to be sure we picked up every button before we left!

Crayola Washable Colored Bubbles

Today we spent time outside.  I broke out some bubbles.  Including these:

Grammy bought them an Easter or two ago for B and his cousin.  They came with bubble guns, which were super cool, but which jammed pretty easily.  These bubbles are thicker than regular, and take longer to burst, so that's cool. 



B was really into mixing the bubble solutions of different color, adding water and regular bubble solution.

I am so glad that this stuff is washable. 

A few months back, I blogged about G's attempt at stalling at bedtime.  Last night, he showed up in my room in a panic. 

"There a tiger in my bedroom!"

I glanced up from Pinterest. 

"Here, G, use this sword and kill the tiger.  Then go to sleep."  I handed him a pretend sword.  G and I hand each other lots of pretend things: cookies, dog treats, weapons.  It's cool. 

"Ok!" he agreed as he dashed off to his room. 

A minute later he re-entered my room with "Tiger Pooh":

Then off to bed he went. 

The Food Chain

G has been really curious lately about what different animals eat.  I'll spare you my answers and just share his side of our recent conversations. 

"Mama, halligators eat people.  I a halligator.  Yah!!"

"Mama, bears eat people.  I a bear.  Yah!"

"Mama, hippo-pahmuses eat people.  I hippo-pahmus.  Yah!"

"Mama?  What birds eat?...Worms?  No, they not!  Them eat fish!"

"Mama!  Caterpillars are scared of bears.  Bears eat caterpillars."

"Bears not eat bearies.  That silly."

"Mama!  What dinosaurs eat?...T Rex not eat other dinosaurs!  Dinosaurs eat carrots!"

G enacts T-Rex eating pretend carrots

G has until third grade until he starts learning the food chain.  I'm not going to worry just yet.  Still, I wish he'd listen to me every once in a while!

The Case of the Missing Case

Last Saturday, I lost my contacts.  Yes, plural.  I lost both contacts.  Actually, I'd lost the contact case that was housing both my right and left contact.  I have no extra contacts; this is my last pair.

The night before, B and I had returned home around 10ish.  We'd been to Natural Bridge with Cassie and her boys that day, only to return to a storm so torrential that we couldn't see five feet in front of her minivan.  Because of the low visibility, we'd hung out at Cassie and Tommy's until the storm died down enough for me to see the road.  I'd had a migraine on the way back from Natural Bridge and had slept most of the ride to Cassie's house.  By the time we'd reached home, we were both so exhausted we went straight to bed.  Well, B did.  I took my contacts out first since I can't stand sleeping in them. 

The next morning, I could not find the case at all!  Now, when G was littler, he was obsessed an empty contact case.  He loved to toy with it in his little Pack-N-Play while I was in the shower.  As he got older and learned to open the tops, I switched to a blue contact case and let him play with my old green and white ones.  I still find old cases in odd places in our house: under the couch, in the hallway, near his bed.

So, my first move was to bring G in for questioning.  After thorough interrogation, I felt I could rule him out as a suspect.    Interrogation involved bringing him to the bathroom and asking him sweetly if he could help me find my contacts. 

"I find you's contacts, Mama!"

"No, G, that's an old contact case.  My contacts are in a blue case."  G does know colors. 

"I find you's contacts, Mama!"

"No, G, that just the top to a blue contact case.  Mama's contacts are in one with two tops."

"I find you's contacts, Mama!"

"No, G.  That's contact solution." 

Had G taken my contacts, he would  not have played this game.  He would have known what I was talking about.  He might have been coy about showing me where he'd hidden the case, but this line of questioning was revealing that he truly had no idea where the case was. 

I gave up.  I'd have to wear my glasses until I could get an appointment at the optometrist. 

Later that morning, Josh called me to the bathroom.  "Is this what you were looking for?"  Apparently, when I had put away my hair straightener that morning, the case had gotten snagged in the cord of the iron.  It had then been pulled into the bottom of the cabinet next to the drawers in the bathroom.  G had nothing to do with it. 

Case solved.  By the way, I have an optometrist appointment for this Friday.

No mushy brains here

Because Catina is a teacher, I am very familiar with the "summer slide".  Simply put, this is the knowledge and skills kids lose over the summer break when they aren't challenged intellectually. To avoid this slide, my kids can be found doing math worksheets, playing online at educational websites, and reading books on their chosen subjects (which have included sharks, frogs, astronomy, and ancient civilizations) throughout the summer months.  Now before you think I'm the meanest, most boring mother ever, I can assure you that my kids are also spend lots of time playing video games, swimming, playing cards, and plenty of other fun activities.  

Another benefit of having a sister who is a teacher?  She takes her kids and mine to the library regularly throughout the summer, and lets my kids tagalong to the museums she visits over the summer.  This summer, I've taken a few days off to join in on some "field trips".  Last month, we spent a morning at the local zoo followed by an afternoon in the pool (and it was a scorcher).  This month, we are headed to Natural Bridge with the 4 oldest kids.  We plan to hit up the caverns, visit the toy museum and wax museum, check out Natural Bridge, and walk some trails (if we have the time and energy).  

The tricky part of this month's trip?  We have decided to leave the DVD players, DS's, and Ipods at home.  This is going to be a technology-free trip.  Well, except for our phones (for safety purposes) and the GPS (also for safety purposes, b/c I have a tendency to get lost).  Yes, we plan to have 4 boys in a vehicle for 3 hours each way, and not bring any electronic entertainment.  Don't worry, we aren't dumb enough to think they can entertain themselves for 6 hours without some help from us.  We plan to bring some folders with car games (printed from http://www.momsminivan.com/printables.html), a few books, notebooks for the boys to write about the trip, and plenty of snacks.  If the boys still get bored, we will throw in some radio time, accompanied by loud off-key singing and interpretive dancing.  Catina and I can be very entertaining like that.  


We may regret this, but it's only 6 hours.  We had many road trips as kids without electronics and not only did we survive, but we *gasp* had FUN.  How bad can it be?